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Monday, October 21, 2013

老师无言了一个星期



我是一所中学某班的班导师。
我自认我非常严肃。是的,我会开玩笑,可是对我的班,我很少如此。

我犹记得,78日,当我刚刚上任为他们的班导师时,我问了他们这么的一句话:
你要我做天使般的老师,还是恶魔?

无可否认,他们选择了天使。
然后,我就警告我的学生,说:“老师的性格是由你们而定。请记住。

日子久了,一个月过去了,我发现,他们好懒散。功课不做不要紧,而且课业非常差,就连简单的乘法都不会。我出了一道题:“二分之一加二分之一是多少?”

吓死人的是,竟然有三成以上的学生不会。怎么办好?

我回想起,以前的我,华语特别烂,常常令老师哭笑不得。但是,我记得,一年级时我的级任老师,赖锦虹老师对我的耐性,慢慢一步一步教导我。我,最后不得不使出这个方法——一个一个学生轮流坐在我隔壁,一步一步慢慢解释,教导。

起初,学生很害怕我,因为我骂人特别凶。有哪位学生被训导处记过,我就再骂。再加上,我班的学生非常懒散,吩咐他们交上表格都需要等上三个星期,而且还被一名学生揶揄:“老师,你能够在三个礼拜内收齐表格已经算是厉害了。以前我们的老师要用上六个月。”

气死人了。

再说 ,我有这么一次说:“来,等下我要看到白板抹干净 。”岂知,没有人出来抹。被问起时,有一位学生说:“老师,你都没有讲要谁抹!”

糟糕。这么样的班怎么带?

结果,我出狠招,开始对他们又唬又喝,威胁说只要有任何科任老师投诉,有关受害者就要被罚抄五张纸,道:“我xxx来自xx班永远不会在班上xxxxxxx。”

九月的一天,一位女同学跟我哀求:“老师,你变回天使啦!”

我狠狠地瞪了她一眼,还微微的“哼”了一声,再加上粗重的口气说:“不可能!”

102日,弟子规老师跟我投诉班上学生讲不听。我一气之下,喝令他们去扫树叶,做苦工。到了第二天,我开始对我班的学生不闻不问。学生问我什么,我不答,连瞄一眼都没有,最多凶凶的瞪他们到他们不敢跟我做眼神交流。

103日,我赫然发现桌子上有一封信。打开来看,发现是一封短短的道歉信,信中原文:

老师,对不起啦!
我们又害你被老师投诉,我们也是不想的。
对不起啦,老师。
我们答应你我们再也不敢让你被老师投诉了。
我们尽量啦!
老师,不要emo了!快点跟我们讲话啦!

心狠就是心狠,我把信收起来,当作没看见,连华文老师也摇摇头,说:“你怎么可以那么样?心还不能软?”

我铁石心肠。

过后的那几天,我讶异了。

平时,当我一进班,班长会大大声喊:“起立!行礼!”接着,“老师早安!”然后就等我说:“早安,坐!”他们才肯坐。可是,因为我默不作声,他们想听的“坐”字久久未从我口中溜出。结果,整班就站着上课。下课时,有一群学生向我深深的鞠躬,拉长说:“老师,对不起!”

我的脸依然如此冷冰冰,可是心里笑了几下。你们活该。
109日,班长再次喊:“起立!行礼!”但是,声中带有“老师,快点被我们大声地请安感动吧!”的语气
我还是无动于衷,转身就在白板上龙飞凤舞写出一道道习题,而全班仍旧站着上课。

随后的那一幕,我愣了。

全班都在努力的回答习题。

他们从来没有这样过。他们数学很差。他们害怕我。但是,不知为何,他们鼓起勇气开始作答,努力的向周围的朋友请教。这一幕,我看傻了眼。因为这一幕,只有在优秀班才可以看到。

然后,有几位女同学在放学时,追上我,拉着我的假丝绸衣裳,说:

老师,你快点讲话啦。
老师,你知道么,我长过那么大,读了那么多年的书,没有一个老师不会讲话。
是咯,老师,我求求你,快点讲话。你不讲话我们很怕的。

我扯开衣服,回办公室去。

1018日,年终大考。第一天,很不幸的,考数学。我心里想,看你们厉害!

1021 日,我批改他们的试卷。


我……


他们的分数……

一个星期多没出声,没教书,分数竟然比起上次高几十巴仙。


我心里想:这次是我错了么?

在此,我懂了。

Monday, October 7, 2013

Excession Quasi-review


For those who are unfamiliar with Mr Reynolds' works, I can say you can start reading Pushing Ice and Terminal World. I strongly recommend these both. The tone of these two works is very different. Pushing Ice is more towards a TV-drama with super-episodes which it narrates how life is hard for humans on Janus, a fleeting moon from Saturn. But Terminal World, wow. Steampunk. Meaning there isn't any room for spaceships and fantastic physics. The exile of a doctor and his journey back looks more like a pilgrimage to me. His noble acts make me think of Merlin. (If you do not know who Merlin is, I suggest you to wiki it. No offence.)

Excession, written by the late Iain M. Banks, was (no longer 'is') my first attempt to keep off my addiction to Alastair Reynolds' space operas. Yes, in case you wondered, I am indeed addicted to Alastair Reynolds' works and I am waiting for his latest novel On the Steel Breeze and I will definitely grab it from the bookstores and burn it with my eyes and heart.


OK, see how much I flood (and flirt) myself with Reynolds' works?

Back to topic.

Excession is bought, mainly for the reason that... erm... I love blue colour. Notice the book cover and you know what I mean. It's the same reason how I broke my novel virginity with Reynolds. Yeah, I know I am stupid. And, yes, there is another reason. I love BDO.

You may ask what BDO is. It's a literary device meaning "Big Dumb Object". It means a huge object appear in the arc of the story but plays little or no significance to the story. Like the yellow brick road in Wizard of Oz, the brick road serves no purpose.

In Pushing Ice, the BDO is Janus, the huge (tiny) moon from Saturn. And in Terminal World, a relatively significant BDO is Spearpoint, a megastructure.

For Excession, we have - no prize for guessing right - a perfect black-body sphere that does absolutely nothing except protecting itself for no reasons (till the end is a different story, though, it even bid me farewell).

So, this novel is a very different novel. So different that my brain stops functioning for days before continuing. Reason? OK, so usually a story is written in any person's point of view. Like Snow White's story, you can get what Snow White did but never know what the Queen is doing due to the view is focused on Snow White.

In Excession, man, the point-of-view of characters are not living things at all! Gosh, you can see ships talking to each other, AI speaking and scolding a human etc. My mind suddenly requires additional time to settle things down. It's like listening two tables having a chitchat over a tiny table with a glass of weird coffee.

But all in all, the story is fun. You get to see a huge narrative on different subplots that makes you slowly sinks into the couch before continuing. The late author gives you time to set in, that's a huge plus otherwise I think your mind will go bluescreen and open in safemode.

If you wonder whether I will recommend this book, I say, three-and-a-half out of five yes! Try reading things in a weirder perspective! You can have more surprises than before!