If my friends didn't remind me, I wouldn't have noticed that I never been to a trip with my friends to anywhere for fun. Never. Really. Primary 6, the trip to Langkawi? I didn't go because of SARS. PMR trip to Genting? I can't go to Genting. Form 4 to Genting and Cameron, I can't, because these two places are prohibited for me.
I never have a proper time off for myself. I have been busy with writing novels, playing piano, studying and drawing, busybodying with events and last of all, playing computer games at home.
I wonder how is it like staying in a hotel room with my friends. How is it like taking taxis to go to theme park or beach with my friends. I never have that kind of experience. Yeah, my life is sad and boring as you all have said it a thousand times.
"What do you usually do during sembreaks? No hangouts?"
I can reply you: NO. NO HANGOUTS.
I am just staying at home. Wake up in the mornings, have breakfast, wash clothes, play piano, read newspaper, write novels, lunch, play computer games, piano, dinner, TV, novels, SLEEP.
I guess my life is really boring huh. And because of that, I'm a boring guy except when chatting. I don't know about cars and techs gadgets. I don't know about clubbings. I just know, in the universe of people and friends, I am just a lonely guy who sits in the corner picking uninteresting pebbles to play.
Well, maybe next sem, if I have the chance, I will buy myself a train ticket and head down to K.Lumpur and take a round trip before coming back. Maybe. If I have the guts, that's the condition.
Haiz. I should have not reactivate my Facebook. Every time I see those fun times my friends are having, I always ask myself why I never had the chance to hangout. Perhaps because I can't go online during my sembreak. Everybody was invited through the internet.
Eff you internet!
"MZ, why nobody dates you out for dinner?"
"Got, only a few, like Dinesh, Andy, Domdom and rare occasions with Ziting and Jasclyn."
"None of your coursemates?"
"Well, I saw some of them having dinner. I asked on Facebook, but they didn't reply me. I guess I am not worth having dinner with them."
"Is it something wrong with you that causes them not to invite you?"
"Yeah, maybe. I have thought about this many times but I can't figure out why. I didn't EMO like last time. I mean, I love dinner with my friends, why would I emo in front of them? I only emo when there's nobody dinner with me. Ah, never mind. It is fated. Let's wait after graduation, perhaps my working life can make my life a twist!"
Nuff said. I hate myself and love myself.
Good morning, and you're watching Neruvatar's Cry.