I admit I made wrong choices this semester. In my mind, echoes of 'I shouldn't this... I shouldn't that...' are driving me sleepless. Nonetheless, I thought, maybe I am always over-confident with something and under-confident with another.
The wide gap of polarity is reducing me into something as tiny as a bacterium, or a virus.
My mum often says, "don't linger with your ghost of past for too long, for you might be one that neither dwells in the present, nor future."
And I think I am lingering on for too long. But not long enough to be 'the one that neither dwells in the present, nor future'.
Someone, PUH-LEEZE PULL ME BACK INTO REALITY!!!
Trapped by the ghost of the Cycle, I am still struggling to find ways to eke out a living till now. Hmm, the 4-hour chat last time didn't seem to ease the pressure. I am shrouded by a dark entity that causes me to swallow the guilt and sin that I've made.
I am going for a pilgrimage, to understand what causes the Cycle to happen around me. What causes weird stuffs to happen in me.
I hope I have time for that, for my family and my friends.
Hear the shatters of my heart, that falls to the deepest abyss on can find.